Is This A Revolution?

I attended a fellowship with my SFC brothers yesterday and for me it was really fun. We had great time and I really missed the company and the warmth. I haven't been with them for such a time since my work prevented me to do so, but the fellowship really gave me something to ponder on and this is why I have a new post for my blog. You can call it reflection or something like that. I know all I need is an inspiration and time to write. So, the time that thoughts came through my being this afternoon, I hurriedly stopped everything I was doing and typed what my mind and heart said about the topic yesterday. It was all about evangelization. It was all about how can we spread the good things God has taught us. The topic was amazing and the speakers were great. But it struck me more than what its main objective convey. And here it goes.   

I firmly agree that the best way to evangelize others is through ourselves. If we make ourselves worthy of emulation to others, then we can move people. I am not saying that you have to be a hero or sort of but being a person to others just simply means you do what is viewed and accepted to be God-centered. Just like what my Tatay Jay has said, to which I quote and added some words, "you need not to be Biblically or Qur'an-lly functional, that whatever is being written in the Bible or Qur'an, you follow."  Bible and Qur'an are not books of rules; they are books of guidance. If you start following what is there, you'll end up silly. The Holy Books don't tell us to read and follow, they tell us to READ, UNDERSTAND and LIVE with the thought. They are like a path that will guide you on your way as you deal life. That is why until now, I am not moved by those people who get on the bus in bus terminals and start reading the Bible without making themselves worthy of reading it. The worst is, after reading it, they start asking you for some donations; giving you little envelopes where you can put on a penny or more.

Many of us have expressed their interest of making this world a better place by showing selfless love to others, but we have failed to forget that it is not the main thing. Many of us have asked to topple the tyrants in our governments but we failed to topple the tyrants from ourselves. Many of us have asked for a revolution and it has repeated multitude of times in our history but we haven't revolutionized ourselves. I still can remember the play of words saying,  'the heart of the revolution is the revolution of the heart'. Many of us have said that others are not good but we have forgotten that, the times that we have said so, we did exactly the same. Some have killed people because they committed murder but these people forgot to remember that they, who killed these people, are also murderers. We ask others to be honest, but we too are liars. We ask others to share blessings, but we too are stingy. We ask our friends to love their parents, but we too don't love ours. We ask people to be a part of our religion but we too don’t know what our religion is all about. We cannot teach what we do not know. We cannot give what we do not have. We cannot ask what we do not deserve. We can’t evangelize if we are not worthy of doing so. We can’t let people believe on something they can’t even see on us.

These words may be too vague and I don't think I have the credibility to say so, because who am I by the way? But I know, and I say it with deep impression, that we have people around the globe who have been recognized as heroes of the present days. And I always really bow down to these mortals for their immeasurable kindness and love. They are the true evangelists who did not read the Bible or Qur'an in front of others, but they made these Holy Books in motion. They are the ones who did not ask for people to have a revolution against others, but they are the ones who fervently made themselves a weapon for revolution—a revolution without harm and force, without shouting and yelling, without casting judgments to others, without prejudice and discrimination, without money and gold, without everything, but JUST THEMSELVES-their love and passion to evangelize what it is to be a follower of God, to evangelize the words that must be heard, and the deeds that must be followed.

Do I sound like a priest or a sheikh? I guess not. Because I, myself, am guilty of what I write. I don't even know anything about the Bible or Qur'an. I am even one of those who ask people to be good but I, myself, have not been good to others. But I may say, I am not bad, I am just JUST. I know I am aware of my actions, and I am trying to live up with the expectations of myself. I don't want to see differences because I don't want to compare. Comparing means bragging and comparing means pulling others down. I just follow what my heart says and what my conscience reminds me. I am a victim of my tongue but I am really trying hard to tame it. I am a slave of my emotions and I am also trying, and trying hard to control it. I am an underdog of my mind but I am trying hard to weigh things. I really am trying hard to make things well and right. And I know, what I have tried isn't enough. But I am happy that even it is not enough, at least, I have started. Is this a revolution? Maybe. And I hope I will win.

A Marionette

People feel frustrated because they expect people to have the image they want them to be.

Even our parents who had expected us to be better persons when we were still young, they cannot have the desirable image they want us to be. We are not dough that takes one's thumb to press to change its shape. Same thing happens to the people around us. They cannot expect us to be the person that could fit in to their lives. They cannot expect us to be someone for them to be satisfied. Unless, if we pretend and forget about ourselves, forget about who we are, live up to their expectations and make them happy—that would do perhaps.   

I cannot help myself but remember George Clooney saying, ' our relationships to the people around us are the heaviest components of our lives'. Sad as it is, but true as you try to think of it. All our frustrations and problems come from the people around us. We try to make things up for them and we try to be the person they want us to be. We try to work for ourselves just for them to be happy for us. Then at the end of the day, you find yourself lying on your bed alone—EMPTY.

I am not complaining about having these people around us but I am not up to the thought of being controlled by these people’s expectations. There are some (not all) who expect others to be someone like them. I mean, some say ' Hey, I did these, so you should do the same'. Some say ' Hey, you should do this because I have done that already and you should give back something in return'.

We cannot just be like that, can we? If one has been good to you, then that does not mean that you have to be good for him to be happy. I am not also on the thought that one has to be bad, but the point would be “be yourself”. If you naturally are good, then it is a nice start. But if you are trying to be one just because the people expect you to be, hell no! We cannot afford seeing ourselves as mere marionettes, can we? I mean, you cannot wear a different shirt because you are afraid that he will not approve you wearing the shirt that you really like. And I guess no one would like to wear something not acceptable too. Please do not get me wrong if 'being good' is made as an example. Okay, being good is desirable but you cannot demand people to be the same just because you are like that. If you live your life comparing all the good things that you have done to those who you are expecting to do the same, you will end up disappointed and annoyed because you cannot let people drink the same cup of tea. People are different from each.

Instead of telling people that you have done something good and they have not, better be silent and be an example for others through your actions. Think of it by yourself and ponder on why it has been that way. I am not actually against the thought of doing good things on earth. I mean, who does? But that does not give someone the responsibility or the right to practically tell the whole world what he has done and let them do the same to him. Things will normally go smoothly as it is, so let us stop pushing doors.

If people cannot show you the same good things you have done to them, then it is not for you to tell them to show it. Remember that if you have done good things to others, you need not to COUNT. If they have not given back to you what you deserve, then leave and do it to the people who could give you what you think you deserve of having. Why can we not get rid of counting the things we have done to others? Lest we forget that if we do, we naturally are not generous and good but we are just trying to be one—winning people’s hearts, and pleasing them.

If things did not come out as what you have expected, then stop and start all over again—just do not cry over spilled milk and try hard to have the same milk be given back to you. For parents, if your children have not lived up to your expectations then do not nag and tell them your frustrations. Instead, ask them what they want for themselves and help them achieve it. If people have not been good to you, then look for someone who is. Or better yet, be who you really are and let yourself be a subject of other else’s guilt.

If yesterday was not as what you have expected, live up for today and stop expecting.

Taming The Tongue

I attended an assembly with my fellow SFC brothers yesterday and it gave me guilt being there because I haven't been in the community's activities for quite sometime. My tito's welcomed me warmly though. We had a meaningful and merry evening. We had games (mind-bugling games, mind you!), unlocked puzzles and listened to a talk delivered by Tito Marlon. The talk actually struck me to death. It was about how we people use our tongue in all things and occasions. I started to realize that truly our tongue is one of the most powerful medium that we all have that can turn peace to war, can topple tyrants, can destroy people and the worst, kill! It stuck me to death for I have been so tactless since my conscience taught me the difference between right from wrong. I really hoped to share the time when we had had the chance to do so but conceit pushed me back to silence. That was the first time that I didn’t have the moment of saying what would I like to mean. Then I said, I should have said this and that. Normally, I am the person who says what I feel like saying, without considering anything that my tongue might harm. Normally, I am a servant of my tongue. Normally, my tongue commands me to say something what is not supposed to be said. Normally, things go along that way, and it is something that I have lived for.

But yesterday, normal things were not the same as they were supposed to be. Normal gestures of my tongue were unnoticed. That was the reason why the talk painfully struck me to death. It was silly but something told me that it was an achievement. I don't know. Maybe or maybe not.

There was this feeling of incapacitation in me knowing that I haven't said what I wanted but there was also this feeling of realization that I have done something I was supposed to do before. While I was listening to the talk, I had a lot of things in my mind. Thoughts that could irritate, chasten or embroil the whole thing. But nothing happened. Nothing really happened. And it was not what it has been.

The thought about TACT is a cliché for a person who has been to print media like me, or should I say has lived his life with other people. But I finally experienced how a person would feel to listen to a discussion about tact. It is really a moment that one would wish the floor would bury him to death. Words stabbed me so painfully. It reminded me of my mom and my friends who usually tell me how bad I am. It sucks but somehow, it is more than a wake up call for me to be reminded of something.

Yesterday's talk taught me things that I think I should be working on for. I know they are not that easy, but with God's grace, hopefully, I could---as a person and as an example for others.  

1.   Say what you have in mind only if you are asked to do so. A normal thought yet it is always taken for granted. And I think it is a credit to those who are modest, isn't it? I mean, we all have something to say in a topic but we too, at most situations, don't have the position to say so. We may have the most powerful thoughts but it doesn't mean that we have the fullest right to express them. I can hear myself saying, "I am not asking for your opinion". I know it is rude, extremely rude, but it is true. People just consider it rude because they are struck by the fact that they really are wrong of sharing something without being asked. Have water in your glass first before you drink it. Wear shoes before you walk. Get inside the room before you want to discuss something coz if you do outside, people will think that you probably are out of your mind.   

photo courtesy: Granger Community Online

2.   Back off and help. If you know that a house is being burnt, will you be out of your mind and get some things to light it up at worse? You wouldn't, would you? If you know that someone is being killed, will you help him get killed? If you see an old woman trip on the street, will you push him down and kick? Things are perennial and conventional. Same as gossiping and eavesdropping. We get worse things worst. We burn people's soul. We kill people's esteem and pride. We push people down to the gutter where we have fallen before. Backing off and helping afterwards will have things straightened out peacefully, I guess. These might just be words for me to say but I am certain that I have lived with the thought since I started working. Not for me to say though, but maybe it is for my friends to attest…somehow.

3.   Keep a secret that you think is worthy to keep, but don't keep something you alone don't own. If others own it, then share it not because you betray the person who shared it to you but because you are responsible for sharing it to those who are supposed to be knowledgeable of. As from the talk, to which I quote, " don't promise to keep a secret before someone says what it is nor afterwards". Keeping a secret is a responsibility. It is a vague thing to discuss but it is all about logical and emotional judgment. The reason why some call their friends traitor because the secrets they have shared to them were no longer secrets. But it doesn't have to be that way, as it was always perceived. Would you keep a secret that your friend's mother should know? If you do, then who are you betraying? So it is for you to decide whether or not the secret would be for the common good or you stay faithful to a friend who hasn't been faithful to the people around.
4.   Stay humble. Obviously, it is something that wraps it up. Being intelligent is appreciated, but humility is much loved. We are not humble but it counts if we try, at least. By using our hearts to outdo our minds. At times, we want to be even because we don't want people to call us lame. We want to show to all that we are brave enough to fight. In these trying times, we always want to be ahead of others. But then, if they prick you, why not try to be silent? If they try to make the worst of you, why not try to make the best of yourself by being patient? We hate people trying to let us down, so we should not let them down too I guess. Because if we do, then we should also hate ourselves. If we hate people stabbing us back, then we should not stab them too. Because we will end up stabbing ourselves.

While I was trying to have these thoughts written, one question always knocked me off my head.

     "Do I have the credibility to say so?"

And the answer that I always said…

     "Maybe I don't have. But I will, for sure..." 

My Only Choice

I haven't really thought of organizing a blog of my own since the time that I pulled away writing way back in college. I have always had misgivings on sharing my thoughts online for the reasons of anonymity. I always want to be empirical—that people would believe what I am writing through knowing who I really am. I strongly attest to real-life connection towards my readers--it is a kind of effective. I guess it creates more sense than writing behind the pages; writing whatever I have in mind that might be misconstrued because of the absence of credibility—it is a sort of lame, isn't it?

This has been my thought since I graduated in college. Print media always streamlines effective communication. But my work slackened me from keeping tabs on the penchant I had in my younger years. It shoved me from developing my craft in writing. Though my work at present is attributable to writing, still, time overruns my willingness to write. Aside from that, I am no longer in the limelight (allow me to say that, please!)I am no longer with an editorial staff that produces outputs. I no longer have the public to read my works. Not to mention the untoward meetings with school officials due to some blind items and commentaries. (don't think I was radical)---though they seemed negative, they made me a better writer; they simply meant that my articles caught the attention of professors and instructors. tsk.tsk.tsk.

Anyhow, I finally made up my mind and found myself appending on the craft I left behind. Thanks to my some-kinda-3-week vacation that allowed me to write whatever thoughts that I have in mind. I did create this blog for the reason that I no longer have options to choose. This is the only outlet for me to thrive for writing. Though I hated blogs before, well, what do I have to complain as of now? It's the last one standing. So, I'll just slack off on this blog. I will just write what I have in mind: concur, chasten, bluster or append—whatever I like. If you feel like hitting an entry, then just go ahead. I hope I could have my own reading public here. I am fervently hoping for that. Welcome to my blog!